News News News.

It's been a while lol.
I'm okay now.
College is being wonderful, really. I never thought it would be so cool as it's being. ^^
Yesterday I got so so so drunk LOL.
Hehehehe =]

News.

So a few days have passed ..
On Sunday I was with him for the last time. It was cool actually. From 5:00 pm until 9:30 pm ..
He was like "I only be able to make it until seven" but I was like .."can you stay a little bit longer ..like 8 or something?" And he said "Humm ..I'll stay with you until it's 9 o'clock" ..
He was pretty sweet, and our "farewell" was aswesome ..he said "it doesnt mean like ..the end" ..ohoh ..
We chated on monday and yesterday, and less than an hour ago he sent me a message, and I called him ..we talked for a few minutes ..yeah ..I miss him already ..

So I went to college on monday. Some things were nice, others were crap. I decided I wont be praxada [ ahaha ] anymore. Bla bla ..whatever. (:

Oh ..bought two piercings yesterday ..and the little siamese is still there ..he's lonely now ..they sold his brother ..bah ..I would so want him .. :(

Changes + Changes + Changes ..

So what's up? ..humm nothing at all ..
Oh I wish ..Some things are ok ..some things are simply shit!
So ..yesterday at 6:00 am I was writing a letter for my boyfriend [ soon ex-boyfriend ] in the back of the cuttest photo of me in the prom day lol ..So many things that I wanted to say ..but there wasnt much space ..I'll give it ti him tomorrow ..the last time that we'll be together as a couple ..I feel that he really wants to go so ..there's nothing I can do ..I guess ..
He's right. He tried to save the relationship so many times ..but I was too damn mean ..well ..let's see what future brings ..
Oh and I asked him for the whip ..hehe :X
It has been rainning a lot .. weeeeeeeee :D
And college starts Monday ..let's see ..
I predict ..changes + changes + changes ..
And the thing is still hided ..waiting for October 3rd .. x)

Is this it?

I'm scared. I really am.
I ..like to think that he's going to come back to me. But ..he seems decided not to ..
Today I finnaly finshed my college papers & stuff ..but I made a mistake x) ..whatever ..
I went to see the siamese kittens ..oh gosh they're so fucking cute ..they were not quiet at all this time, they were playing and a buch of people was staring and smiling ..yeah ..freaking adorable thing to be seen .. :')
I start going to college on monday 25 ..yeah ..the same day he leaves ..for good [ at least of ou love life he says ] ..
Bah ..

Some news to myself.

Trying to find Tool great. But I can't. Lol.
Today was a great day. My boots. boots. boots. Lovely! :D
I got a necklace too, a thing for my hair, and something cool which can be used in many ways.
Ahaha I feel ok. Even with him leaving. Even with college stuff to do within a few hours [ I need to sleep .. ]
The only thing that's upseting me is that I want that siamese .. :|
Damn ..

Ps. purple nails! \m/

Part two & End.

So, yeah. At 5:20 am last night I got in panic. Dumb reasons I know. I was supposed to wait with Desiderio, but I was feeling like shit & too damn tired, so I went to my bed. I said for him to call me when it was 8:00 am. but he kept calling me every other 15 minutes. That anoyed me. Finnaly I knew. Yeah, I'm gonna stay here for college. Awesome. That's what I wanted. I really like it here ..at least for college. Yeah someday I want to expand my horizons, of course. But a few years later from now. I have a dream location. England. I would love to work there, to live there. Kicks ass ..I used to dream about that a lot. Me & my [ still ] boyfriend, together there. Stupid lamme plans argh.
I decided that I won't say another word about him leaving [ aaaagain ]. But I still hope ..yeah on Monday I'll pick up a very important thing ..ehhe ..
So Sofia is going to be with me again! Wee ..trouble! At least some good news. =]

Music . Foo Fighters - Walking after you [ Beautiful :') ]

So ..

It's 5:00 am. and im here talking to Desiderio on msn. My boyfriend is offline for one hour ..we fought a lot today, by net. I can't help it. He's going away. He's going to leave me again. How can he do this?
He already gone away from me once ..almost three months ..why is he doing this?
I mean I know I'm not the best girlfriend in the world, but he's not an easy person as well ..sometimes I just feel that we dont belong together, but then I see that it's not like that ..we have a stupid huge connection ..it's a waste of time try to deny it.
I feel like writing ..I love him more than anything in life ..I just feel that he doesnt feel the same way about me ..at least anymore. And yes I've been mean. Sometimes [ many times ] more than I should, and he his patient & tries to deal with me.
I'm scared of losing people ..since I was a child ..I always felt like ..I somehow lost the ones that I loved the most ..there's a thing with my father and ..my grandfather ..I never liked my mum or my grandmother that much ..I mean I admire my gradma, she was a very beautiful woman when she was young and all that ..but she wasnt that great in mind stuff. My grandfather was a little cruel, in spite of being a good hearted people. He was always ready to help everyone who needed it. He is a great man and I feel happy to be his grandchild. =]
Now back to my boyfriend ..yeah ..he's my first and only boyfriend ..he's the only guy I have ever kissed and said "I love" to, in my entire life. We started to date in 13/10/2004 ..it's a long time ..I feel like ..he's really part of me ..something like my brains, my heart, my face ..he's inside of me ..I'm not strong enough ..I need him so much ..
If he's gone I wont cry ..but I'll spend most of my days gazing at nowhere, eating chocolates, on my couch or bed, getting nostalgic ..
I dont want to lose him ..
Well ..right now waiting until 8:00 am to find outto which college I go ..
Waiting with Desiderio ..